Pages by Kishore Murthy

Currently blogging here

Thu, 08 May 2008 16:36:10 GMT

I am currently blogging here - Umbra by Kishore Murthy

life of pi

Sat, 17 Sep 2005 12:16:03 GMT

"To choose doubt as a philosophy of life is akin to choosing immobility as a means of transportation "

Ah! Such depth and sight... ' Life of Pi ' is a beautifully written book..

jungle love

Wed, 31 Aug 2005 07:36:14 GMT

imagine.. feeling every muscle in u'r body ache under the strain.. the shoulder bearing the back pack radiates a soft pain that slowly creeps up u'r neck and continues to increase with fatigue.. condensing dew and sweat dripping off the tip of u'r nose.. the cold rain hitting like rocks as u shiver and shudder, drenched to the bone.. the wetness keeping u awake and on the move.. the wind reminding u of a greater terror, hypothermia.. making tremulous steps u exhale vapor in the humid air.. the stench of decaying leaves and incessant hum of unseen insects fill u'r senses with fear and disgust.. leeches crawl along the path, slimy and slender they sense the heat off u.. u walk in brazen steps not caring.. u slip in a muck filled tiny ditch, wince as u'r ankle twists into almost a sprain.. u recover and go on.. the silence amidst the humming background shattered occasionally by bird calls and incomprehensible whispers.. the jungle is alive.. and now u know that u are too..

caw caw goes a crow

Tue, 02 Aug 2005 16:30:06 GMT

as I sat editing some pics.. uncle hurriedly comes down from the terrace and grumbles very quickly.. he seemed excited.. but not in the good way.. once he repeated it again.. I realized it was a crow in distress.. he said it was hanging by its wing that seemed to be stuck on a thread from a kite that went down.. I ditched my work.. ran upstairs.. and saw a crow dangling from a thread by the tip of its left wing.. the thread spread from a coconut tree to the terrace compound of my neighbor opposite my house..

I could not see anyone.. and the caw caw caw of the other crows seemed deafening.. I ran down and was about to enter the neighbors place and ask permission to get to their terrace.. and what do u know!!!!! the good neighbor heard the caw's and was on the terrace and he cut the thread and released the crow..

the delight, the flight of happy freedom .. all of them disappeared in seconds.. and it was silence..

I head back home.. well!! caw

ps: uncle feeds the crows every day on the terrace.. usually at least twice.. he even feeds some stray cats that hit the terrace looking about and cajoling him into feeding them.. a softie he is :P

auto rick n shaw

Tue, 02 Aug 2005 10:59:19 GMT

the weather was pleasant but not for driving my bike to work.. it was 1930 hrs.. well! I wanted to be back home anyway and decided not stay back at the hostel.. and so I took an auto just as it seemed it would pour.. the streets were a little empty.. very breezy the bangalore winds struck my spectacled face with many leaves and sandy dust.. it felt good..

hmm.. steaming hot corn on a cart.. hmm.. should I stop to grab one and munch like a small monkey and head to work with a grin ;p .. maybe I should grab a chaat or one of the charcoal roasted corn coated in spicy masala.. well! today was not one of those days since I was in a hurry..

lazy as I am, I left home a tad late.. I need to take over my shift at 2000 hrs.. well! my relief on duty never lands on time.. so.. whatever.. excuses.. excuses..

I strike up a chat with the auto driver.. bubbly fellow.. just needed someone to tickle him in kannada.. and he took off into a streaming flight full of thoughts, ideas and talk.. from politics, to traffic, the weather, IT.. he knew it it all.. I listened fueling his enthu as I laid back on the seat and rested.. a tape played in the background, old kannada songs and had me humming as I listened to the vivid banter of this youthful chap..

he talked about how kormanagala was before the forum happened and how bangalore was before the fly overs and one ways happened and cussed the govt for their lack of work on the roads and increasing congestion..

I was in a hurry.. and the traffic seemed to thin.. I pondered to myself thanking my stars.. and as though my mind was read, the auto chap goes on about the same.. " neevu thumba lucky saar.. evathu traffic kammi idhe " and contemplates the likely reasons for this good fortune.. and I pray.. oh! god.. let not speaking about it jinx the smooth ride..

it goes on.. as I slip into my contemplative world, simultaneously engaging my mind to the loquacious driver and bite a glimpse of his world.. and looking outside at the so many others driving by in their worlds.. fascinated..

I keep trying to remind myself that I am in a hurry... and before I knew it I was dreaming again, as I listened to the driver, the music.. each layering on top of the other.. he pauses I add in a word, a sentence and he takes off from there.. of his work, his life as a auto driver and family.. as I drift again in amazement..

well! I remember that I was heading out to work and was not on a trip.. hmm.. maybe I was on a trip..a trip to work.. hahaha.. heh! why am I laughing ?P

the trip ended abruptly as almost a km away from work, a traffic jam.. the first in the entire ride.. surprisingly we had touched only two red signals in the entire journey.. and now.. the event tried to balance itself..

as the driver now irritated cribs on the traffic and while doing so turned around, and spotted a friend in another vehicle on the road.. so he said hi.. and suddenly wham!!!

he was not looking ahead.. so when the maruti van in front came to a sudden halt.. we rammed it.. the only luck.. is that our speed was almost negligible.. yet .. an altercation ensues and I sit and watch.. as slowly the heat subsides and we continue on a few more meters.. still stuck in the traffic jam.

well! I had to get to work.. so I pay him.. as he goes.. come on sir.. sit for another five min I will drop you.. smiles exchange and I part after paying him the fare.. a tip and some good words.. and walk the distance to the hostel to change and cross the still jam-packed road to the other side and get to the hospital campus.. it was around 2030 hrs..

ps: do ignore the tense errors..am too lazy to edit and while u are at it, u can also ignore the grammatical blunders :P

hmmm

Mon, 01 Aug 2005 07:16:19 GMT

Its been a great few days and I.. I.. I.. I am feeling quite happy :P

untitled

Mon, 18 Jul 2005 17:35:06 GMT

to Adapt... to Survive... to Thrive... to E V O L V E

ugliness

Sat, 16 Jul 2005 12:45:37 GMT

ugliness is a beauty that disgusts...

ugh

Wed, 13 Jul 2005 18:36:54 GMT

I just finished watching KAAL.. and I have three words to describe it -
crappy, stupid, nonsense..

untitled

Tue, 05 Jul 2005 18:46:16 GMT

ice.. like crystal.. birthed by the fluid.. frozen
hot.. like lava.. birthed by the earth.. molten
steam.. like cloud.. birthed by interaction.. vapor

I feel like ice hot steam :P

oh.. its just another rant..

Wed, 08 Jun 2005 07:51:50 GMT

torn, mounted and splayed I find myself.. paralysed by a zillion different things I wish to do.. woe me to try and do it all .. only to fall gasping and exhausted when I had just begun.. haha

stupid me .. stupid me.. yeah.. yeah.. tomorrow is another day but it wont be today..

Music Meme [ tagged by the squirrel!! ]

Thu, 02 Jun 2005 19:50:14 GMT

argh.. here goes.. [ u can find the squirrel here ]

Total volume of music files on my computer:
1343

The last CD I bought was:
Velvet Revolver- Contraband

Songs playing right now
car: I don't drive much and my car does not have a player..

home:
Jethro Tull and Velvet Revolver

work:
groans,beeps and hisses of the ICU

Five songs I listen to a lot, or that mean a lot to me:
John Petrucci's guitar solo
Joe Satriani's love thing
Pink Floyd's time
Creed's with arms wide open
Aerosmith's taste of india

Five people to whom I’m passing the baton:
azooey - for I have no idea as to what she listens to
kalyan - interested to know how he is faring on the music front in the wild
fugney - am sure he will enjoy this meme / any meme for the matter
zeeshanmn - should be interesting to know what makes him go jiggy
yathin - what do u play on u'r scorpio dude?
satz - apart from the click of a shutter what else do u listen to buddy?
thaths - enlighten the world please ;)
jace - dude what do u dig when it comes to music?

oh! that was more than five .. so what ;p

glimpses from yesterday

Tue, 24 May 2005 18:29:49 GMT

the quite frequent..death in ICU.. (a/c gastroenteritis/severe sepsis/post cardio-respiratory arrest/hypoxic encephalopathy).. passed away peacefully.. shift ends.. the streets wet.. tells a story of heavy rainfall (few hours before).. clean the dust of the seat of my bike.. wearing an helmet that does not allow my glasses (woe me for buying one before I acquired spectacles and for being lazy to buy a new one now)..

I drive into the wind.. flashes of lightning.. of dust and carbon-monoxide rich smoke spit by every machine.. five minutes.. thick traffic.. five more minutes.. only a kilometer covered and more thick traffic.. drizzle breaks out.. turns into a torrential rain of large drops slapping all over my eyes.. with difficulty I navigate out onto the side of the road.. park and jump onto the footpath and take cover under the tarpaulin sheets of some small shops.. people huddle like rabbits.. chatting among themselves..

soaked in just few seconds.. hungry and tired.. a cuss slowly forms in my mind.. I spot a food joint in the cramped space.. make my way in the crowd.. a small stool to sit.. a smile greets me.. a moderately built woman.. hindi speaking.. likable .. me spot a small kitchen at the back.. and try to size up the aloo parotha the dude next to me is munching on.. and so it was.. ordered aloo parotha.. was the best I ever ate.. dahi and spicy chutney.. chillies and aloo.. felt warm inside and watched myself smile in content.. the glow returning to my cheeks.. looked around.. spotted few female forms to feast on while I waited.. five minutes.. find myself eating a pani puri .. five more minutes.. a samosa.. yum.. as time ticks .. its almost 2200 hrs.. the rain decides to calm and becomes a light drizzle.. wet and tired but warm in the belly I walk onto my bike in an enthusiastic stride with a smile stuck on my face..

wipe the water off the seat.. head home.. slush splashed by the bus next to me as it hits a puddle.. spotted a fallen tree crashing thru the compound wall of a house and onto the road.. drive on.. passing unmanned signal points.. and crazy driving by fellow men.. still alive.. I drive on.. plish plosh and lot of slush.. another fallen tree.. way out onto the street .. almost midway.. a small traffic jam.. I drive on.. drunken man tries to cross in front of me .. walking, he trips and falls on his a$$.. right in front.. I drive on.. missing his head by a few inches.. phew..

bus almost rams me into a median.. I honk and give a stare.. unlikely the driver seated like a king at a higher level to have spotted my stare thru the crash helmet's visor, let alone feel something because of that.. still .. I stare and honk again .. and speed off into the dark night overtaking the king.. hehe.. only to get stuck behind an auto and a luna.. both puking smoke thick enough to choke.. lighting up blue as light strikes the dark smoke laden night ..

ah.. the smells and sights of an urban land choking and gurgling.. I drive on.. towards home..

untitled

Wed, 11 May 2005 18:08:35 GMT

to cry.. to laugh.. to be afraid .. to love.. to hate.. to resent.. to be loved.. to play.. to rise.. to fall.. to be stuck.. to be thirsty.. to be curious.. to be excited.. to burn.. to heal.. to excite.. to jump.. to leap.. to float .. to live a thousand deaths within.. to just be.. and so continues the saga of life...

mind is a blur

Sat, 30 Apr 2005 11:31:58 GMT

I see myself and realize I can't see clearly.. Its not the glasses.. Well! Maybe it is .. hahaha

slowness, disordered and random is the thought.. the wind blows outside.. bringing the smell of the world as I hide inside my shell after a tiring night.. oh! just let me be ..

I get it.. I need to go back to sleep.. and wake up into another day of beeps, sounds and groans of an ICU.. some days are exciting, some tiring and uncertainty is the ruler of all things.. and then.. maybe.. I will go for a run :)

ah..

Sun, 24 Apr 2005 10:24:35 GMT

I took my pencils out after so many months and sat in front of a blank sheet of paper in the hope of sketching something.. After few minutes and some random strokes I had a thought stream of weird shapes, forms and colors.. which was quite amusing and doesn't quite say much, while saying a lot too .. heee ..

So, basically I did something I had not done in a long time and came up with funny results that I won't be sharing here .. hahaha

waking dream of color & bzzzzzz

Mon, 18 Apr 2005 18:09:10 GMT

fly.. fall.. thrilling in experience.. wind slappin me in the face .. pulling, pushing and making creases.. clothing flutter in a pattern unknown making noises that add to the weee of the roaring wind.. I close my eyes slowly as darkness envelops me as I enter the world of dreams.. full of color, splatters of red, yellow and green.. gurgling blue and blushing pink.. forms make themselves known and fade as I try and attempt to grasp.. I run in mid air .. stretch in my arms flailingly.. wild are my attempts, wrestling with nothing but air.. eyes fall on a glittering point the size of a pin head.. a gravity of a thousand suns.. my entire universe squeezes thru.. comes out in a world of greys and pinks intertwining .. each fighting to find its place.. a world of worlds that just collapsed over and into the other ..

I wake.. twisted .. to an ordinary world .. and find myself smiling.. as a mosquito hums in my ear.. phut.. goes my hand .. and I go back to sleep to yet another dream full of humming mosquitoes lookin for blood..

killing - nature's way

Thu, 31 Mar 2005 03:09:01 GMT

cat on terrace.. a stray that gets fed twice everyday.. large belly and full nipples indicating pregnancy.. births a litter 2 days ago.. in the back of the roofed and caged balcony.. I trace the whines to a cardboard box ..

attacked by a male at night.. timely intervention prevents damage.. cannot take it in and adopt.. bound and chained by the rules at home.. after more than 30 cats over 13 yrs.. it is hard and so it has been for five..

left to nature.. I get back.. early morning another male, another fight.. three dead of the four.. one whining.. the cat won't let me in.. the box now is highly protected.. it is not so familiar with me to allow access and assess damage.. I silently scream.. allows me to take a peek and that is it.. I wait.. I wait.. with patience to attend to wounds and the dead..

such is the way of nature.. the very cats that came together.. bringing new life.. one protects it.. the other views it as emerging competition.. one feeds it.. the other kills..

sadness

Wed, 30 Mar 2005 03:22:32 GMT

time runs forward.. u run with it or rather u try.. sometimes u stop to look around.. life goes on without u.. and then u comeback.. to start again.. to run in loops.. until one day u pop..

connections with other souls made.. sweet exchanges savored.. in the same way the connections can crack and the souls drift away.. only to come round again in close juxtaposition and re-established..

life and its intricacies.. life and its simplicities.. sometimes life gets twisted.. sometimes it is the reality or perception that is twisted and sometimes it is u who gets twisted..

a grey sadness creeps in through the door.. silent tears break away from the surface tension that holds it together and trickle down the face.. such tears are much better than the tears of blood..

untitled

Sat, 19 Mar 2005 18:02:50 GMT

elements in conflict ... elements that seem part yet are outsiders
look away for a while & it collapses into the heap it came from

introspection runs in endless circles that sometimes spirals
spiraling outward or inward... like continual banging on a drum

how I feel tonight

Wed, 09 Feb 2005 18:00:10 GMT

Online thesaurus search gives me all this to describe my current status ...hahaha haha

49 entries found for tired

Main Entry:	tired
Part of Speech:	adjective
Definition:	exhausted
Synonyms:	annoyed, asleep, beat, beat up, bored, broken-down, burned out, collapsing, consumed, distressed, dog-tired, done for, done in, drained, drooping, droopy, drowsy, empty, enervated, exasperated, fagged, faint, fatigued, fed up, finished, flagging, haggard, irked, irritated, jaded, narcoleptic, overtaxed, overworked, petered out, played out, pooped, pooped out, prostrated, run-down, sick of, sleepy, spent, stale, tuckered out, wasted, weary, whacked, worn, worn out

hmmm

Sat, 05 Feb 2005 16:57:00 GMT

a walk in the terrace ... cool breeze brushing against my face..
a meeeeaaaoow of a stray cat that uncle feeds every night ...
as I sway like a tree to the wind and hum to myself some tune unknown ...
a sense of peace falls over me ... and I feel whole again ...

ahhh! so pleasant :)

patience begets impatience

Sat, 05 Feb 2005 10:33:46 GMT

With patience you maneuver tackling all that come your way ... handling the hurdles one by one with good sense & presence of mind and at the end of the day you retire to bed to a realization of an agitated and impatient mind that refuses to rest...

Is this the price that one pays to stay at the edge pushing further and further until the day when patience, good sense and presence of mind just dissipates, only to be replaced by irritation...

You realize your folly that enough time was not spent resting and recharging and learn that - If you burn too much ... you end up burning with it .

story of an exam

Mon, 31 Jan 2005 19:35:10 GMT

an eager wait ... looking around to spot some lass to bookmark in my mind ... as a distraction to amuse myself... to stay awake.

sniffing around to get a whiff of perfume ... to let lose my fantasies as I prepare my mind ... all attempts failed .

an odorless room of shapeless people ... a growl from my tummy ... a feeling of thirst ... water near the wall ... drink I might ... but then to stay without a piss for 3 long hours ... hmm ... difficult ...

omr sheet in hand ... inked the details with the pen provided ... bell rings ... paper in hand ... 180 q in 180 min, nothing compared to the 300q in 210 minutes just a few days ago ... a voice in my head ... go slow ... read twice ... then again.

instructions read 'think before u ink'

answers I mark ... an hour goes ... now the growls come every minute ... I look around in desperation, no point of distraction worthy of attention ... and still no sweet odour ... is grooming dead ???

a cough by someone ... starts a chain of throat clearing ... a silent fart by my neighbor makes me queasy... I get up and walk to the wall ... drink water ... walk back to sit ... and sit .

10 minutes go ... growls replaced by a burning sensation ... feels as though the acid will just melt through and flow like boiling sludge .

a ringing sound from one of the bags kept at the corner of the room... this neighbor again ... forgot to switch off the cell phone... %^&$#$

2 hours gone ... throbbing headache ... a hangover would have been better ... letter by letter I read ... trying to make up the words ... only to re-read again to make up the entire sentence.

two guys ask for permission for the potty and are granted after some discussion... one stud finishes the paper and cockily tries to walk out early... only to be frozen in the chair for the next hour staring into nothingness ...

no answer can be changed once marked.

its almost over ... minutes go like hours now .. I slow down my answering to stretch with the time ... I finish to the ring of the bell .

another day ... another exam ... and so it goes ... as I live to every heartbeat and breath ...

long long day...

Sat, 04 Dec 2004 07:01:59 GMT

It was day of small disasters under whose guidance the events revolved and the outcome was interesting.

I had to go to St. Johns Hospital yesterday to register for an ACLS course and it was already getting late. It takes around an hour to get to it from my place. It was 1130 hrs.

But due another small work in Malleshwaram I had to take a detour. I go to malleshwaram and finish the work and bump into an old friend at the parking lot. This guy is like a brother to me. I wanted to meet up with him for some time now and voila.

After sharing some pleasantaries and setting up a meet on the weekend. I rush to St. Johns Hosptital, the traffic is a bit thick and it was getting close to lunch time and I had to get there before that else I get stranded for the next hour or so with no guarantees of getting my work done.

As I am driving the bike's engine goes dead just like that (a kilometer before Johns). I try to start the damn shit for 10 min, no result. So, I just park the fellow and start walking towards Johns. I reach the Emergency Medicine Dept. at 1255 hrs. I ask the security guard that I am looking for blah blah and what do ya know she was standing right there and in under 5 minutes the work is done. Money changes hands , applications are filled and voila its over.

Now, I walk back peacefully thinking of what to do with the bike incase it doesn't start and where to eat lunch.

I reach my bike, try to start it and my efforts seem to be of no use. So, I decide to have lunch and try again on a full stomach :)

I look around and realize that every food place is packed and its kinda boring to eat alone. I decide to call my good friend Vasu who lives nearby. Surprisingly, he is home cos he was unwell and was planning to go to work right after lunch.

I take an auto and land up at his place and we head out to lunch to a place called Gramin at the Raheja Enclave in Kormongala. The ambiance and the food was great despite the place being small. I bid my byes to Vasu after some interesting conversations on foreign politics, economy and local political crap.

Now, with a full belly I walk back to my bike that is parked close by to the restaurant. I decide to push the fellow to a service center that I saw half a kilometer away. I land there and there is only a kid.. he tinkers around with the bike for an hour and is unable to figure out the problem.

Finally, the boss walks in and he tinkers around for a half hour and identifies the glitch. The coil was burnt and had to be replaced. That took another one & half hour to get, rewire and fix.

This guy was good and efficient in his job. So, I figure why not fix the other chota mota problems of the bike too... considering the day practically was done due to the bike. So, I invest more money and time on the bike.

In the meanwhile I talked to the shop guys and other customers who came by. It was some very interesting chat and loads of stories from their lives. Without having to say much about myself I learned so much about their lives and shared some good moments.

It was around 2000 hrs by the time it was all done and I drove home, feeling good about everything. It was 2100 hrs when I got home and I never for one moment felt like the day was a disaster day.